The tip of the ice berg

Yesterday I had an info day at work. That means all the HR people will gather together somewhere else than our own work space and talk about things that are important or relevant at the moment.

There are 4 people of the HR division that organize this – every time different people. I didn’t put much effort into organizing or I couldn’t find tasks to take on in the organizing process, so at the very last meeting I volunteered to be the MC of the day.

Since my upbringing has required a lot of public speaking and performance, I’m used to being in front of people and nowadays leading an event or even leading the choir practice, has given me skills to do well on stage. So this was a no brainer to me.

Apparently it was a big surprise to the others that it was easy for me. They see me at work everyday – I’m a good communicator, I’m fun and friendly and open and smiley – so they like me. But they don’t know that I’m also a great performer.

I didn’t want to write about how awesome I am (though I am, I know that) but I wanted to write about a realization I made through that little experience.

And that is – people don’t know the whole picture of me and isn’t this quite a big part of who I actually am? The real question is – how much do I know about my colleagues? How much do I know about my acquaintances or even my friends, in that matter? How does the picture of me look like in the people’s minds that surround me?

Another question – how careful and thoughtful am I in portraying others? Do I give them fair opportunity to be awesome in various ways? Or do I not want to or care to see the whole picture and be prejudice about what I see and close myself to the other colors of the image?

We think we know them. We think the others know us. But it’s soo not the case. Do we take time to find out who the other person is – what are the strengths, talents, interests, bucket-fillers etc? Not until it actually influences us, right?

We are pretty comfortable and convenient people. We try to do as little as possible but be as successful as possible.  So we get to know the person when it is useful to us – we either like the way they make us feel or they are useful to us in other ways. How do we measure our success? What are the measures of being good people?

I think we should try to be selfless and loving – little more every day. It all comes down to the most precious gift we can give to another person – our time and attention. The priceless gift and sometimes the hardest to give away.

I miss you... Not YOU though, you live too close...

Today I saw a comment on Facebook where a friend of mine asked another friend to hurry back from her trip.

I started to think about this and it flashed that I do the same – I start paying more attention to the people that have gone abroad or farther away from me. For some reason I miss them more...or something.

But is it really so?

There are some of my friends that I see so rarely. And I do miss them. Yet. Do I put an effort into meeting them? Not really. This would require some planning and an actual get together. But aren’t we too busy for that?

If only the person so far away could be here – we’d spend loads of good time together...

If I miss the friends that are far away and tell them that, does it mean I don’t miss the friends close by? Or do I just not acknowledge the fact that I haven’t seen them in weeks, maybe even months? I guess the reason is that they are so close to me. I could see them any time I want.

Which makes me come back to the question – why do we want things or people we can’t have? And not appreciate the people that are in our reach?

Uhh, just thinking about it makes me dislike myself a bit. I’m such a hypocrite at times.

I’m not saying I don’t miss the people that are far but the people close by should have an equal chance of being missed and loved in my life.

Does it make sense?

So what will I do about it? Probably not much. I don’t have time to meet up with them. Or I DON'T take time. There’s always this to-do-list at the back of my head that I need to do. But do I actually do them? Not really. But I certainly couldn’t do them when I am with my friends doing leisurely things. I like the thought of getting to work when I want to. But not often I do. So why not just spend the time with my friends then?

Ahhh, dislike. To me.

Time management – still learning the difficult skill. Not doing so well yet.

I have a friend that I don’t see that often. So when she wants to see me, she makes me say a concrete date of when we’re meeting up. And it works. I’ve done it with some other friends. When you leave it open and say that lets see when’s the best time for it – there never is. There’s always this to-do-list telling us not to have fun.

I think I’ll probably contact you soon to have a little get-together – just because I can!!

If not earlier, then you are invited to my birthday party on the 20^th of October. Let me know if you’re coming! I’ll bake something! :)

Done deal!

You know the day....

....when you bump into your reflection in the mirror and think "Wow, you're pretty today!" ?

Yes, today it's happening for me. Even though it's been quite an emotional and tiring day, after all this, the girl in the mirror looks pretty.

Thank you God for blessing me with health and beauty!

Look at me and say you don't agree, I dare you! :D

Photo: Ulli

Joy and excitement

More and more I realize how important it is to have a positive attitude about life. Sometimes I have to work hard to be positive and sometimes I just need a reminder that God gives us the joy and love and peace we so desperately need!

I got a bit discouraged few days back and through that I realized I had painted a picture of my future I so desperately wanted to have for myself. My mind worked day in and day out a plan how to make it work – and the stupid brain of mine couldn’t figure things out. Go figure...

I’m sure God was laughing at me. I’m sure God looked at me and said: “Oh, you silly girl. You honestly thing YOU can figure out MY perfect plan that is beyond your understanding and capacity? Why don’t you just sit back, relax and let ME do all the planning?!”

Why not? :P

So what else can I do, if I shouldn’t schedule my time with worrying and planning the next thousand years of my life? The answer – ENJOY THE PRESENT!

And you know what – I do enjoy being happy! I do enjoy the fact that I have people in my life that are happy with me! I do enjoy that I have so many things to be thankful for! I do enjoy the excitement of the unknown and the God’s secret plotting of my future! I do enjoy God in my life! I do enjoy when it's one of my good days and I trust and feel God being with me all the way! 

Would you consciously decide to be happy with me? Would you receive and acknowledge the joy and love and peace God has for you too?

Let’s all be happy and excited about life, what do you say?

I just couldn't love you any more than I already do.

„I just couldn't love you any more than I already do. Unless I could, in which case my heart might explode.“

You know the feeling when you really really care about someone and you realize that you actually LOVE that person?

Meaning that just the thought of making the other person happy, makes you happy. Or when your mind travels from one idea to another of how to let the person know HOW MUCH exactly do you care and love that person?

Liisu sent me the quote a while ago. She might’ve liked the quote or she wanted me to know this about her towards me.

It’s saved in my work inbox as a draft and time to time I go and read it. I’m tempted to delete the draft, since I don’t like something unfinished in my inbox. Yet I can’t. It’s a good reminder of something unreal.

I picture myself saying that to someone. There are few people I’d say that to all the time. But do I actually do it? A slight uncertainty falls on me if the people actually know how much I love them and how my heart might explode if I thought about it just a bit more?

Recently I took a love language test. The 12 is max and this is how I scored:

10 Quality Time
9 Acts of Service
6 Physical Touch

4 Words of Affirmation
1 Receiving Gifts

It was interesting to see those results and I started to think this is quite accurate. Then I thought that how easy it would be to love me if you knew this about me.

I went even further and started to think what would be the best way to show my love to my dearest ones. I got my mom do the test and I was surprised of the results. I’ve known my mom my whole life and yet I didn’t know this little thing how to make her feel loved.

Just yesterday I had to admit that just by thinking about someone, made me want to leave everything and be with the person and never let go.

Sometimes you do your best to love someone, doing the things you’d want someone else do to you but is it what the other one appreciates? Your heart almost explodes from the love you have for the special one, yet the other one thinks you don’t care at all. Cause you just don’t know.

Take time and get to know the person you love. And then really show some LOVE. You’re probably in their lives for a reason. YOU are the special person who’s love counts. Do it. Love. Now.

Clearly...

30 years of marriage.

My parents married THIRTY years ago. They were such beautiful people. And they still are – but you can see the 30 years on their face.

When I was a kid, I loved my mother’s soft hands. Mommy-hands. I could see the wrinkles on them, yet the hands were so soft. They still are – mommy’s stroke on my face is one of the best things in my life.

Now as we are both adult women, it happens rarely, but still does. Now we show our love through other things – through words, kind deeds, smiles.

Just yesterday someone told me that I walk like my mom. Clearly – I’m my mothers’ daughter.

When I was a kid, my dad used to take me in his hands and press his face against mine, even though my face was covered with scabs and it wasn’t that pretty. Dad said, he never cared and only saw how beautiful his daughter is.

Now he never does that. We hug only on special occasion. It makes them so much more valuable. Through the years, my respect towards my dad has grown to the skies. I’ve been told that I’m bold as my dad and that I’ve gotten the organizational and administrative talent as well as guts to perform from my dad. I couldn’t agree more. Clearly – I’m my fathers’ daughter.

As I’m older, I can see their marriage. They’ve had their struggles, as everyone does. Yet I can see how they both love each other to pieces.

One thing that they both have – this selfless serving of others. Doing the little and big things, either together or separately, without asking anything in return.

I love my parents. Clearly – I’m my parents’ child. As are other five wonderful people.

GOOD FRIDAY

How can I be sad on Good Friday when I know why He died for us? How can I be sad for the things He went through, when I know the end result is victorious?

The comic describe pretty well what people in general feel when Good Friday is near. We start to mourn and feel sorry for Jesus and for what He had to go through. I don’t think there’s one bit of regret, bitterness, sadness, anger or hurt in Him for doing what He did. Should we have any of those feelings in us when He doesn’t?

Of course it’s a good reminder of what Jesus did for us but I think it’s the time for a big celebration. We should remember His sacrifice and gift throughout the year. Even more, we should celebrate it throughout the year but we’re human, it’s unnatural to be happy and cheerful and on top of things the WHOLE time. Am I wrong? :P

God is on top and we should be on top with Him. Usually we want to be on top and that is never a good thing and we find ourselves on top of another mountain God didn't give us to conquer. Then we have to come down from that mountain and start climbing the mountain God had picked out for us. Anyways.

We often ask for His forgiveness for all the sin we’ve done. Which is a good thing. But how often do we remember to thank for the forgiveness and Grace we have received already? Do we believe in the freedom we received through Christ’s death?

We need to say it out and believe in it even if we don’t. Little by little we actually will. God will help us on the way.

Oh, Jesus, thank you so much for dying for me. I’m sorry for all the things I’ve done that are not bringing Glory to Your Name. I accept and receive Your Forgiveness and Grace and dwell in it. There’s no greater joy than in You! I love you!

“Shout it out and lift up one voice in worship
Sing it out until all the earth can hear it
Jesus is alive and He saves, He rescues and saves!”

Listen and sing along:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUuVsuxBoqc&feature=relmfu